——You know your own sins better than anyone else.
In the long time that remains, I regretted over and over again that I was not by her side at that time.
But no matter how much we regret, lament, beg, or pray, nothing would change.
It only took an instant to lose something important. You could never get it back again.
That brilliant dawn-colored hair, that compassionate smile, that soft voice—everything was gone.
There was no salvation in my life anymore——...
——I was dreaming.
My dream was to serve her again in a world slightly different from this one.
………Ah, this is a dream, I know clearly. Or maybe I have finally died.
The person still had the same red hair and golden eyes, and was smiling happily.
Seeing this brought tears to my eyes, even though I had no right to do so.
...Ahh, this is the view I was unable to protect. A cruel yet beautiful sight that could never be regained.
——Over and over again, I repeated the same oath I had continued to swear.
"If I could serve you once more, this time I would protect you from anyone, anything, and everything in this world."
When the person in my dream heard what I said, she smiled happily.
"―――Canopus!"
Hearing my name being called, I opened my eyes in surprise.
When I sat up, I realized that my nightgown was soaked with sweat. My heart was beating madly.
"Are you, crying?" (A knight)
He asked in shock and put I put my hands over my eyes. Where my fingertips touched my eyes, I was surprised to find that they were indeed wet——It had been years since I'd last cried.
"...Maybe I had a dream. I don't remember though..." (Canopus)
I replied to the knight in my room and got up from the bed. In fact, even though I was crying, I didn't remember anything about the dream.
"Haha, isn't this a reference to you tonight? After all, you'll probably end up crying your eyes out on your pillow at night after being rejected by Her Highness the Second Princess." (A knight)
The knight, who was two years older than me and shared the same room, spoke to me with amusement.
I shrugged as I changed into my knight uniform and replied in a calm voice.
"It's not just me. More than 100 other knights will be rejected today." (Canopus)
"No doubt about it. You are blessed just to have the right to be rejected." (A knight)
We left the room exchanging joking words and headed to the dining room.
This day was the day the second princess would choose her guardian knight. I was fortunate to be one of 100 candidates. It was clear to everyone that I would end up just being a candidate, but...
——I am a knight of Nav Kingdom and my name is Canopus Brajey.
The clan originated from a remote island located in the south of this continent. I lived in Sutherland with my family until I came of age, but I desperately wanted to become a knight, so I came to the royal capital at the age of 13.
Unlike the land of Sutherland, the royal capital had almost no remote island residents. Therefore, my appearance with brown skin and webbed hands was perceived as creepy and led to discrimination. At first, I felt indignant and fought back, but as the discrimination continued, I soon got used to it. Even if I argued back, it would not have changed anything, so I got into the habit of remaining silent.
Thankfully, my sword skills and etiquette were appreciated, and I was appointed a knight the year I arrived in the royal capital. However, as I was a commoner from a remote island, I was unable to stand out from the "Vast crowd" of knights.
——A turning point came for me when I was 17 years old.
That day, I was gathered in the castle hall with many knights. This was because the second princess would be selecting an escort knight.
Over 100 knights were gathered in the hall, and the princess was to select one of them to be her guardian knight, but it turned out that the knight had already been decided. I thought that was only natural. A knight whose role was to always stay by the princess's side and protect her with his life in case of emergency. It would be natural to select someone with a solid background in advance.
However, it was disappointing that this role was only given to the children of high-ranking nobles. Even among those of low rank, there were some who were loyal and skilled. I hoped that one day, we would live in a world where such people were chosen.
As I was mulling over such pointless things, it seemed the time had come, and a large group of people entered the room through the large front doors. Everyone present bowed their heads. After a while, when we turned our heads back, what appeared before us was a young yet adorable Princess. The second princess had crimson hair just like the first princess, and from the color of her hair it seemed likely she must be a saint with great powers.
The princess stood on a platform several steps above, and it seemed as though she would immediately mention the name of the knight she wanted to be her guardian, but contrary to everyone's expectations, she jumped down from the platform and began to approach us. Then, her face lit up and she gave me a cute bow.
"Nice to meet you, I'm the second princess, Serafina. Today, I'll be choosing a knight." (Serafina)
The princess was very adorable as she walked around in front of us, giggling. As I watched with a smile, the princess suddenly stopped walking in front of me and looked up at me in surprise.
"...You're very strong. What's your name?" (Serafina)
"Yes, my name is Canopus Brajey." (Canopus)
Although I was surprised to be spoken to out of nowhere, I pretended to be calm and replied, and the princess smiled happily.
"Canopus, would you be my knight?" (Serafina)
I was shocked and froze. The other knights, as well as the high-ranking civil servants waiting at a distance, all froze in shock. However, the civil servants immediately came running to the princess.
"But, Your Highness, that is not true. This is not your Highness' guardian knight. Come on, please tell me the name you remember."
"Father told me I could choose whoever I wanted." (Serafina)
"Th-That, that may be true, but the names we have shown you are just a reference, and all of your Highnesses up until now have chosen those names. I think it would be best to choose a name that is a reference."
"First of all, isn't that person a citizen of a remote island? He doesn't have the family status to be a knight of the princess."
The civil servants desperately argued, but the princess just smiled without showing any sign of concern.
"Thanks for the advice. But I prefer Canopus. ...Canopus, would you be my knight?" (Serafina)
The princess repeated the words once more and looked at me with sparkling eyes.
I glanced over at the civil servant, who shook his head vigorously with a frightening expression on his face. But, that wouldn't be realistic. There was no way I could say no to a request from the princess.
I got down on one knee and took the knight's bow.
"I, Canopus Brajey, will dedicate myself to her as a knight of the Second Princess Serafina Nav. I ask for glory and blessings for my Princess." (Canopus)
Saying this, I bowed my head and kissed the hem of the princess's dress.
The princess smiled and turned around. Then the Vice Commander of the Knights, who was the princess's guardian, approached with a magnificent sword in his hand.
"Guarding royalty is a job that puts your life on the line. Never be afraid to risk your life." (Vice commander)
The Vice Commander said this and handed me the sword.
"With this sword, I appoint you as the guardian knight of Her Highness the Second Princess Serafina." (Vice commander)
The sword I received felt heavy in my hand. The intensity of the Vice Commander's glare also showed how much he valued the Second Princess.
——I had been entrusted with a very important role.
I felt a sense of humility and was truly grateful to the Princess for giving me this role.
Perhaps due to my youth I did not understand the constraints of the world, but even so, I was grateful that she had broken away from tradition and chosen me, someone without any backing, rather than the pre-determined child of a high-ranking noble.
That was the ideal vision of the future that I had hoped for just a moment ago, "I hope that someday the world will become like that." Something that at the time seemed impossible to achieve was now becoming a reality before the young princess's very eyes.
...Ah, I serve an honorable princess who has the power to cut through reality. When I thought about it like that, an indescribable sense of elation welled up inside me.
"I will serve the princess wholeheartedly."
I vowed to myself.
——And so, to my unexpected surprise, I was selected to become the royal family's bodyguard knight.
And so, for the next ten years, I served as Lady Serafina's guardian knight, and the princess turned 16 years old.
Lady Serafina grew up healthily and became a beautiful woman with crimson hair and golden eyes. At the age of 15, her great abilities and past contributions were recognized, and she was bestowed the title of "Great Saint", the first such title in the country's history.
As a result, Lady Serafina, who had become the Great Saint, was forced to keep up with an even busier schedule than ever before.
Lady Serafina's life was tightly controlled from morning to evening. Some of the schedules seemed too packed, such as monster exterminations scheduled every day or a tour of as many as ten medical centers in one day, but Lady Serafina never complained.
And then, Lady Serafina's schedule was all decided a year in advance. No matter if it was a case involving an influential person or an urgent matter, it was nearly impossible to insert a new case at the last minute.
——That day, I was talking with an envoy from Sutherland in my private room.
The message was that the "Yellow spot disease" had finally become widespread in the land of Sutherland, and they were earnestly praying for the Great Saint's visit.
Yellow spot disease was originally a disease that everyone would suffer from during childhood, characterized by yellow spots on the hands and feet and a mild fever. In rare cases, adults could become infected, but in those cases the symptoms were milder than those experienced by children. —Even though it was supposed to be that kind of disease, things were different when it affected the people of a remote island.
When people living on remote islands became infected, yellow spots began to appear on the hands and feet and then spread all over their bodies. They suffered from a high fever, then became confused, and eventually died. A local doctor speculated that the people of the remote islands had evolved independently and therefore had a different resistance to disease than those living on the mainland, making them completely resistant to yellow spot disease. In fact, almost all patients who contracted yellow spot disease died within one month. Moreover, the disease spread incredibly quickly. By the time the envoys left Sutherland, 10% of the population was already infected.
"The decision to deploy the Great Saint is made at a meeting of high-ranking civil servants. Both I and the clan chief have requested this many times since the illness first began six months ago, but she has yet to be selected. All we can do is continue to request and wait for her to be selected." (Canopus)
I repeated the same words I'd been saying for the past six months.
"The people in the mainland don't see us as equals! In this situation, there's no way we'll be chosen! None of the local saints, nor the saints from other regions who are known for their powers, have been able to cure us of the yellow spot disease! Our only hope of salvation is the Great Saint! Or what?! Is the country telling our clan to die out?"
The envoy cried in a rage.
"...I accompany the Great Saint every day, but all of these cases are life-threatening. The high-ranking civil servants rank them in order, even though they cannot be ranked. I have no choice but to leave it to them." (Canopus)
As a fellow countryman, I understood the envoy's feelings and tried to somehow persuade him.
In reality, Lady Serafina's events included ceremonies and events for high-ranking nobles, but I had come to understand the importance of these political events, so I wasn't able to answer.
However, I understood that the land of Sutherland was fatally far away. If Lady Serafina were to travel to Sutherland, it would take about three weeks, including the time it took to get there and back. Having witnessed firsthand just how precious the Great Saint was, I came to understand just how unrealistic it was to have her all to myself for such a long period of time.
But there was no way the envoy could understand such a thing. He grabbed me by the collar and started yelling in a rough voice.
"Canopus, have you degraded to the status of a dog kept in the royal castle?! What kind of remark is this, talking like it's some other personal matter?! Why did you become the guardian knight of the Great Saint?! If you make a wish, won't the Great Saint listen to it?!"
"That's true. If the Great Saint is a merciful woman, she may listen to my plea and appeal to the high-ranking civil officials to add me to her future schedule... However, such a route must not be created. The Great Saint must not have any special favoritism or preference. At least, not something that comes from within the Great Saint's heart... I am the Great Saint's guardian knight. I will only act in the interests of her." (Canopus)
"Canopus!!"
The envoy glared at me with blazing eyes, but I could only stare back in silence.
...Either way, even if it were added to the schedule now, the earliest it could happen would be a year later. Given the rate at which the disease was spreading, that wouldn't be enough.
Even if Lady Serafina were to visit Sutherland a year from now, all that would remain would be a few dozen or even a few hundred survivors who managed to overcome the disease on their own. With such a small number, it was difficult to pass on our ethnic traditions and pride.
Death as a nation—that was what was clearly facing our future.
...I appealed to the chief and suggested that the residents relocate.
With everyone gathered in one place, we could not prevent the disease from spreading explosively. With new cases emerging one after another, it was difficult to completely isolate sick people. Furthermore, it was not realistic to bring all the infected people to the royal capital to be cured by Lady Serafina.
That's why I suggested to the chief that they abandon the land of Sutherland and scatter to the north, east, and west.
However, no matter how much I spoke, the chief did not nod.
Yellow spot disease was a ubiquitous disease. Even if the location was moved, there were still risks in that location.
Due to a volcanic eruption, the people of the island were forced to leave the island they had lived on for many years. I threw out the dough once. Once was enough to abandon your homeland. Furthermore, if they were to separate, they would no longer exist as a nation.
...As the chief spoke quietly like this, I couldn't say anything more.
I left the room in a gloomy mood and took my leave of the envoy.
"Oh, Canopus. What are you doing?" (Serafina)
...Unfortunately, I happened to bump into Lady Serafina, who called out to me.
Although I felt bad inside, I greeted her anyway.
"This, Lady Serafina. I was just seeing off an acquaintance. Lady Serafina, aren't you being careless to go out so late at night?" (Canopus)
"Well, well, you're so enthusiastic to look after me even when you're not on duty. Don't worry, I have the knights accompanying me." (Serafina)
Lady Serafina smiled amusedly and glanced back at the several knights standing behind her.
"Who were you talking to this late at night? I thought maybe it was a secret lover, but it seems to be a man. Is he from Sutherland?" (Serafina)
Lady Serafina asked with sparkling eyes and interest. Lady Serafina saw him after we had parted ways, but from the man's back she could make out his brown skin and azure hair.
Wanting to finish up the conversation before Lady Serafina noticed anything, I put on my normal face.
"Yes, I was fortunate enough to be bestowed the title of Count and the land of Sutherland when Lady Serafina became the Great Saint. Since then, a special envoy from that land has come to report to me periodically. This time was no different, just another regular report." (Canopus)
"I see. But I'm sure the people of Sutherland will be glad to have you, a fellow countryman, as their lord. They say the sea in Sutherland is exceptionally blue. I'd love to go there someday." (Serafina)
Lady Serafina, with her eyes sparkling with innocent radiance, looked about 16 years old.
"I would love to show Your Highness around Sutherland." (Canopus)
"Well, that's a promise. Canopus." (Serafina)
Lady Serafina smiled happily and walked with the knights in the direction of her room.